desire

From what I tend to observe, when someone like you is worried about what you’ll say exerting sexual pressure, but is coming from the wonderful, thoughtful kind of place that you are, these worries are often displaced. In other words, I’d say it’s highly likely that with how you feel about this…

Sometimes when we’re in a really horrible spot, on top of being supported, an unexpected gift can help, too. So, I got the best gift for you right now I could think of and that I had access to. It’s Kate Bornstein! If you don’t know about Kate already, know that she’s one of the most amazing people…

I’m a little uncomfortable with how you’re framing this. I’ll do my best to fill you in on why. It’s also really tough for me to answer your question given the way it’s framed. I’ll explain that, too. When someone suggests they want sex with someone, and seems to be suggesting that sex would EVER be…

The excitement of everything early in a relationship can be one of the most amazing feelings ever. Everything is perfect! Your partner is adorable! Everything about this person is endearing! You always get along! Everything feels so easy and natural! You both have permanent goofy grins pasted on…

It certainly sounds like this isn’t a good sexual relationship for you, and perhaps hasn’t been throughout. I’m not surprised you’re feeling dissatisfied, and not surprised you find yourself experiencing anger and resentment around your sex life in this relationship. It sounds not only like your…

Our sexual development is a lifelong process, one we actually start before we’re even born. Our sexuality and sexual development isn’t the same at every stage, mind: infant or early childhood sexuality is a very different thing than adult sexuality. But it’s still almost always present in some…

There is little in the world that varies as much as human sexuality does. So, even when we have a couple common variables – let’s say all 18 or 19-year-old women: both an age and a single sex or gender there – we are still going to see a huge variety within that group based on all the other…

A lot of what I’m reading in your post suggests to me that you two are just not in a good place for sex together right now. Someone telling you they don’t want to be intimate, that they don’t like it when you do sexual activities for them, that they don’t like to do them for you is usually telling…

One teen’s experience with loving in plural.

Sex addiction is a popular topic on talk-shows and in mainstream media (where the goal isn’t accuracy, but ratings), but it isn’t something many sexologists consider credible. I’m not on board with the idea myself. Our collective ugh about it has a lot to do with the way addiction is clinically…